I have a keen eye for thrifting and when I saw this leather backpack purse for $15 I couldn't believe my luck. I can't live without this type of bag and one in such good condition at this price was a steal.
The lady at the counter was very impressed with my find.
Sometimes in life it's when we aren't looking that we hit upon the best things.
There are no shortcuts to overhauling psychology. Something as primordial as our education in childhood which included gender rules cannot be refashioned overnight. This explains why everytime I thought I had arrived at a baseline I continued to progress into a different version of myself.
If you don't need to undergo this process then be glad. However if your dysphoria is powerful enough to have had you seriously consider transition, it becomes almost mandatory.
I spent much of my life worrying and wasting energy which is why I counsel my children to work on eradicating this human flaw as much as they can. Given how much life will throw curve balls your way there is no point in it. Most of my fears never materialized but I braced for them regardless which made me feel obliged to build a suit of armor to go into battle.
That readiness is no longer required but the instincts remain and they show up most often in the disdain I have for the world's unfairness. Knowing I cannot fix the world, I drop my preparedness to attack and embrace calm.
I can have a very nasty disposition when it's needed but I have chosen to dismantle it slowly and be more forgiving of people who are largely more ignorant than full of malice.
So I embrace the motto of Alfred E Neuman and say "What Me Worry?"
Hitler did the same thing in Germany in the 1930's that Trump is doing in today's America. It is a slow and methodical capitulation by companies, universities and individuals who give up without a battle. It is then left up to the people to boycott and protest.
This is how the Weimar Republic gradually became the Third Reich.
American writer Sinclair Lewis is attributed with saying that when fascism comes to America it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross which is precisely what has happened. American jingoism was already well-entrenched with the only missing element being the blurring of politics and religion which is always a deadly mixture. The US evangelical movement which is basically a perversion of traditional faith has been the element which could be the final nail in the coffin for US democracy; one that now hangs precariouly in the balance.
I firmly believe that you get the government you deserve and the sad state of education in America virtually guaranteed that a complete imbecile would eventually take over the reins.
Societies are roughly split into the hopelessly gullible, the distracted and obtuse, the malevolent and finally the intelligent and just with the latter being the smallest faction.
That basically explains everything.
Jimmy Kimmel has had his show indefinitely suspended because MAGA had a complete melt down over comments made during his monologue regarding the Charlie Kirk shooting.
Beyond ludicrous. I suppose Seth Meyers is next.
No doubt that the orange blob had a hand in this. Good luck America; you had a nice run but now it's over.
Something smells fishy about the text message exchange between Tyler Robinson and his boyfriend. Read the texts and you realize that no GenZ texts like that. I know because I have two of them as children. The use of language is very atypical for them and no GenZ calls his father "my old man".
I am not in any way a conspiracy theorist but the fact that two incompetent dolts like Kash Patel and Dan Bongino are running the FBI makes me ask questions.
None of the clowns in the corrupt Trump regime can be trusted.
The reason why impostor syndrome exists and even thrives spectacularly among transgender people is because many are worried about being able to adequately, as Judith Butler says, "perform gender". They look at the social expectations and determine that they can't possibly meet them. As a result they are perturbed with being found out or not "passing" (a regrettable term).
There are masculine women out there who are not worried about being mistaken for men (although some are) and simply live as they desire. The same psychology should instill itself in transgender people which should help solve a great deal of their stress.
I can tell you with certainty that everything about you will change once this negativity is dealt with and you will be received far better by people.
Is this insecurity understandable? Absolutely; particularly among older people raised under a strict binary. However that shouldn't automatically mean getting stuck there.
These are dark times to be sure. Societies are unraveling which is largely being driven by economic forces. The majority of the population is in the 'have-not' category which is unsustainable.
No great surprise then that the countries with the highest degrees of unfairness are having the most internal turmoil. The US is living through the consequences of letting its working class carry the brunt of decades of poor policies and abuses by its ruling class.
It's all coming to a boiling point which is why tempers and outrage are being fanned to keep the people from revolting. Social media has become a cesspool after its humble beginnings of simply trying to keep up with friends.
What happens now and when is anyone's guess, but if we base ourselves on the old authoritarian playbook, at a certain point you pass a limit and the dominos fall quickly in succession.
I have discovered over the years that the sweet spot involves not thinking about yourself in terms of a gender. I don't mean calling yourself gender fluid or bi-gender but primarily to think of yourself as you and stop there.
Splitting yourself into halves is even worse because it plays into stereotypes where you are playing a role in either guise. Ostensibly you are either playing the role of man or woman and we aren't performing seals but instead individuals. We risk being caricatures instead of being authentic.
No, the ultimate formula is to think about your essence and your authenticity decoupled from the definitions of society. You become yourself in isolation of those obligations which is the doorway out. Your psychology around this issue matures as a result.
This is particularly relevant if you have no plans to transition.
Once that mindset is nestled in your brain you have hit the sweet spot.
It was tight quarters at the little Cafe Myriade yesterday and my small table was nestled between a young woman on her laptop and an older lady sipping tea and reading her book. After a while another woman comes in asking if anyone has seen a little purse. The three of us look at each other and confirm that we haven't.
The older lady on my right makes a comment about having done that before and suddenly we are immersed in conversation. She sees my purse on the floor by my feet and notes how wrapped up in conversation we can get up and leave it behind.
This lady told me she was 89 (my mother's age) and I was aghast as she looked easily 10 years younger. She was Jewish and tells me her husband has been gone three years now. Of her four children only two are still living as her eldest were lost to cancer. She is part of that stiff upper lip generation that put up with so much and built up their resilience. She tells me what a horrible man Trump is and I concur with gusto.
Of course she has little filter left like my mother and her tone is frank and open. Eventually we tell each other it's time to go but we promise to chat if we meet again.
People can tell when you are open.
I have a keen eye for thrifting and when I saw this leather backpack purse for $15 I couldn't believe my luck. I can't live without ...
