Overhaul

Trumpism is almost over but the clean up will take decades. 

The flaws in the system have been exposed so at least there's that. The fact that someone this deeply stupid, incompetent and criminal was able to climb to the top of the ladder means that a major overhaul is in order. 

Supreme Court term limits plus getting big money out of politics is just a start but they must happen if the average citizen is to matter once again. 

Fair taxation is yet another important step because the latest development of the world's first trillionaire should be a clue that something is deeply wrong.

I am not all that surprised

After interviewing Ray Blanchard and saying he suffered from what is ostensibly a fetish, Ray Williams is now going to transition again.

He still insists he is AGP and says his cross gender expression is basically sexually-fueled. Nevertheless he believes this is an intrinsic part of who he is and he will not disown it despite not having it be necessarily rooted in a sense of identity.

I have always known that some people are more primarily driven by arousal patterns but still benefit from self acceptance rather than trying to "cure" themselves as Ray had tried to do.

He makes note here of the well known fact that transitioners don't regret their decision despite having lowered their libido via an HRT regimen which does tend to take the air out of Blanchard's balloon. Undeterred, Williams is nevertheless still a loyal disciple of what is at best 1980's conjecture.

However, fetish or not, Ray seems to have found a new formula. Who knew human beings could be so deeply complex...

Crash

 

Tolerance

They say happiness is a choice. Since life isn't going to stop throwing us curve balls, it is up to us to view the glass as half full versus half empty. 

Happy is perhaps also not the right word since we tend to equate it with joy; a feeling which only makes appearances on brief occasions. 

I prefer to think in terms of balance which already takes into account life's natural ups and downs. We factor in a tolerance for a certain level of chaos and decide to focus on the positive lessons we can draw from it. 

We also decide to jettison regret which only mires us in what we cannot change. 

The self-help books are bountiful and all claim to have the secret to reduce our anxiety, worry and depression. They want to tell you how they cure the natural human condition but they cannot.

Expensive

To end a conflict with Iran that Trump started illegally will mean paying them 300 billion dollars. Americans don't have health care but some of the money that could go towards it now goes as political reparation for his buffoonery. 

Everything he touches turns to shit. 

Had there not been a war, Iran would have been less powerful than they will now be. Plus they may still be in a position to set up a toll arrangement at the strait of Hormuz. 

The deal that Obama and John Kerry negotiated with Iran will turn out to have been far superior to this surrender. This is the price of impulse and listening to Netanyahu.

Owning the libs keeps turning out to be extremely expensive.

Earnest

Katie is one of the sweetest and most earnest transgender people I have seen online. There is zero pretense with her...

Approval

The only path to authenticity involves letting go of the fear of opinion. Without this ability, everything we do will be passed through a filter of outside approval. 

Our earliest life lessons involved performing to meet a standard. We had to behave in ways that gained us respect and love from our elders through a conditional performance. 

That Pavlov-like trigger doesn't disappear overnight and must be worked on such that our validation comes primarily from within ourselves. 

We risk not being liked or approved of and realize afterwards that we aren't worse for the wear. People-pleasing becomes much less appetizing once we know that many if not most don't deserve that from us. 

The gap between the social version and the real us must be as small as possible. Not because we want the right to be rude or loud at a party but because we don't want to need to fulfill what is expected by people whose opinions don't really matter.

The Bear

"The Bear" isn't a series about being an aspiring all-star chef but instead about the existential angst of being a human. Carm is a brooding young man with a long history of witnessing his own family's dysfunction which he desperately wants to disown. 

The older brother he idolizes suddenly commits suicide which brings his idea of opening a restaurant together to a screeching halt. There are episodes in this series that are hard to watch for their voyeuristic fly on the wall exposition of destructive family dynamics. 

Carm is left with his older brother's sandwich shop which he intends to convert into a fine culinary establishment worthy of his own vision. It's almost as if he wants to excel to wash away the sins he witnessed growing up. 

Highly recommended if you love strong character development and fine acting.

Adversity

One of the areas that really fascinates me is how human beings grapple with and overcome adversity. 

Everyone encounters it at some point and some are burdened from birth with challenges they must carry with them throughout life. 

I began writing in 2012 asking questions along those lines regarding gender dysphoria and there are countless other issues that people face daily which are far more difficult by orders of magnitude. 

Besides asking questions about where dysphoria comes from I looked at how each person dealt with it. I thought about personality profiles, family history, levels of indoctrination, personal resilience and other factors to see how each individual reacts to their situation within their particular era. 

Adversity can sometimes bring the best out of us by forcing us to mature mentally. We are presented a challenge where ignoring isn't an option and we grow as a result of the effort to problem solve. 

I've decided that all forms of adversity make us better and stronger people. It shapes our character, our resolve and boosts our courage. 

Often because, in the end, we have little choice but to persevere.

Life's what you make it

 

Perspective

One of the problems which can arise from being different is that it risks becoming obsessive. We focus on it so much that it takes over the psyche in unhealthy ways. 

I think the secret is to place it into context within the broader picture of who we are such that it doesn't become invasive. We give it the importance it deserves but nothing more. 

This can be very challenging during periods of uncertainty about what to do. We thought we were fine for a while but then ascended to a new plateau where it could become our primary obsession. 

It can be tempting to lose sight of the forest for the trees until we come to a fuller perspective of what constitutes our personhood. 

Retirement can definitely throw a monkey wrench into the way you understood your place in the world. Hence it once again became pivotal that I tweaked my psychology and find myself again within a wider portrait of what it means to be me.