Right versus wrong

 

Solutions

There's a hair solution for everyone. 

Mine is growing in nicely but the crown area is thinner than I would like. Thus I have been watching videos featuring women with thinning hair or alopecia and seeing what they do. 

I now have the answer. 

Even as I continue to work on my scalp I will be ordering what is called a hair topper. It clips into your natural hair and mixes with the rest of it (assuming the colors match). Since I will be coloring my hair and the topper can also be colored (human hair), it will eventually and permanently eliminate my need for wigs. 

Many women who don't have hair loss issues wear toppers just to add volume to their own hair.

I have never colored my hair but I did my homework and will opt for demi permanent dye with no ammonia. After 30 shampoos it washes out naturally. 

I want to have relatively short hair (like my current wigs) because as women age it is more complementary plus it's easier to take care of.

I occurred to me yesterday that I have been transitioning since my mid 40's. It's just that it has been the most carefully crafted and hesitant of transitions. You could almost say I came to it kicking and screaming.

It will only have taken me almost 20 years :)

                           Topper

Happy 250

Happy 250th to my American friends who saw the current fiasco coming a mile away. Starting in 2016 they knew it would be bad even if they didn't imagine how much worse it would be. 

I want them to take solace in the reality that you can only properly repair things from scratch. You cannot do things half way which is why the damage needs to be felt by as many as possible. 

What arises from the solutions to this current mess can only be better. 

People who fall for cruelty will always form part of every society. Their personal troubles are strangely assuaged by seeing others suffer. As America continued its slide under the weight of oligarchy, many fell under the spell of a lazy populism from an idiot who promised to remove their ills. Regrettably many people are simple creatures who easily fall for slogans. 

The damage from this second term is much worse than the first and the cleanup will take decades. However, if at the other end comes a wholesale reform, future generations of US citizens will enjoy a system which renews the dream of a free and prosperous society for not just the tiny few.

Realizations

If we could get a handle on our psychology fully, most of our problems would fall away. 

Think about it. Much of our suffering comes at our own hands; what happened yesterday, the anxiety of what's coming tomorrow plus the magnification of our current challenges into major dramas. 

We are the cause. 

Solving this problem takes living. We begin to develop perspective over time and then we place the proper amounts of energy on things. No more, no less. 

One of our best tactics is to observe the lives of people who are challenged in a way we do not comprehend. We look at them and wonder how they do it day after day. 

Then we realize that it is because they must.

Frayed edges

At first blush the man sitting at the other side of the metro platform from me seems fine. Then suddenly he squawks like some prehistoric bird at the top of his lungs. 

No one reacts. 

We have a mental health epidemic in the world; one brought on by the insecurity and the broken human ties which are not visibly improving. 

When times are stable people feel reassured. When systems break down we end up with societal frayed edges. 

There is never a perfect era because when I was growing up diversity was an unthinkable thing. Conversely we had financial and societal harmony that kept more people from feeling despair. 

No such thing as perfect.

It's the little things

My neighbor came back from Barcelona a couple of months ago and brought me back a little God send. It is a USB rechargeable mini fan that I can carry in my purse and help with relief from the current heat. 

I don't leave the house without it in the morning and I use it judiciously lest it leave me high and dry at the worst possible moment. 

Often it's the little things in life that bring us the most joy; the little details that a friend imparts and tells you they appreciate your place in their life.

51st state

 

Curbing your enthusiasm

When gender variant people talk about curbing their behaviour they are primarily referring to expression. After all, your identity cannot be altered because you are who you are. It simply is. 

Curbing identity could instead be better referred to as repression. 

For example, many older gender variant and transgender people want to stay married and will limit their expression to within the confines established by their union. 

The problem arises when identity is ramped up as the governing factor and choice is steadily removed from the equation. Then we start talking about potential episodes of depression and anxiety over the long haul.

Therefore when we refer to self control we first need to try to understand as much as possible where our motivation originates. Otherwise we cannot know whether control is even warranted or desirable without there being consequences which could include health repercussions. 

Younger people are fortunate enough to be able to solve this problem by eliminating secrecy from the outset irrespective of where they lie on the expression-identity axis. 

However, for older people who may have gotten accustomed to repression and self-rejecting behaviour over decades, the answer becomes considerably more complex.

Oh boy, do I know this firsthand.

King Midas

Democratic socialists of America are starting to make in roads in US primaries. Endorsed by NYC mayor Zohran Mamdani who is putting all politicians to shame, people are realizing that the word socialism doesn't mean communism. 

As a result Mamdani is turning into King Midas by showing everyone how to truly help your constituents. He is making the establishment nervous.

Most of the top industrialized nations in the world (aside from the US) operate on some version of social democratic principles. You tax the wealthy sufficiently and then set up a safety net structure which tries to help the growing number of the working poor. 

Globalization propelled via a neoliberal philosophy didn't help matters for any nation, but we are going to have to work this back if we want to close a global wealth gap that is increasingly creating marginalized masses. 

For their part, Americans are starting to see that the system which prompted them to vote against their own interests for decades, has helped accelerate the affordability crisis. Centrist politicians fed through corporate and special interest donors are slowly becoming pariahs and for good reason. 

All hail King Midas.

On a hot day

I wasn't sitting far away from the spot where she stood in the metro car as I headed home for lunch.

The young trans woman was tall and thin with the only giveaway being her voice. Maybe she was at most mid twenties and adorned with a nose ring and tattoos. A flimsy top with spaghetti straps and a loose skirt were probably the most clothing she wanted to wear in this heat. On her feet she wore sandals. 

She was quite self-assured as she laughed heartily with her two young female friends as if no one was around. 

I love to see the confidence and a body language which ignores everyone around. Not that anyone paid her any mind as she enjoyed the attention of her friends. 

People are used to diversity these days and whether she or I were identified as transgender people on that metro car was irrelevant. As far as I could tell, no one took particular notice of either of us. 

It was just a metro car full of people on a hot day.

How to kill a fly

The recent supreme court ruling on trans atheletes is an example of how to kill a fly with a machine gun. 

In most states, transgender atheletes are either non-existant or represent a tiny sliver (much smaller than the trans population of the state) 

However this is red meat for right wingers because nothing enrages like the image of a transgender weight lifter dressed in a pink leotard sporting facial hair when the reality is more likely a lone spindly trans girl running high school track. 

Meanwhile, Mac Beggs who is a trans man wrestler has been largely ignored because he is going in the opposite direction. If after taking testosterone he beats a weaker and less adept genetic male, that doesn't matter because it doesn't fuel enough outrage. 

Needless to say that everyone wants fairness in sport but that's not what this is about. This is about finding an issue that inflames passion in the ignorant and the bigoted. 

Since human stupidity is a gift that keeps on giving, it will forever remain a primary feature and not a bug.

Like they say, "you can't fix stupid".