Once you understand who you are you need to fashion a life which supports that identity. Living as you did before and settling for the world's expectations for you isn't going to work. I mean sure, you can make anything function but you will be a shell of a person instead of a whole one.
Burning off indoctrination and fear is not easy. If it were, I would have been in a better place with my identity at a much younger age. Sure, the cards were not in my favor given the era I was born in but I might have found my backbone sooner had I not bought in hook, line and sinker to what was preached.Here, trepidation is your enemy and even tiny concrete steps are better than nothing. Hence moving towards a goal through little experiments are a good way to test if you are headed towards internal balance. Better that than waiting for a massive watershed moment at 45 years of age like happened to me when you realize you can no longer go on in the same manner.
Of course people today come to a realization that they are trans very early in life. The resources are there as is the information. For someone like Lily Alexandre who is my daughter's age, there can be options weighed before they embark on a path from which backtracking is exceedingly difficult.
Not that I have regrets but...
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