Saturday, June 10, 2023

One remaining question

Jack's latest article on Crossdreamers about someone being perturbed by their cross gender fantasies got me thinking. 

Gender variant people can generally be split into two distinct groups: the dysphoric and non-dysphoric where the former questions core gender identity and the latter generally does not and is more about expression. Thus the dysphoric is the one who will mull over the idea of a transition and sometimes carries through with it. It is perhaps possible that these two groups bleed into each other.

There is one question which still puzzles me however: For non-dysphoric people is the disposition for gender variance innate or can it also be acquired? My temptation is to say both cases exist but I cannot say for certain. For example, I know of people who begin to express gender variance well into adulthood but then the argument could be made that this latency was due to denial.

Nevertheless, that both the dysphoric and non-dysphoric can experience arousal is not the issue as all people are, to varying degrees, sexual beings. The issue is to understand what its significance is within the context of identity as opposed to the arousal being all or at least part of the objective in and of itself. Knowing the difference is what helps us determine who we are.

One thing we do know; dysphoric people tend to experience more angst simply because there is considerably more to weigh. But people who are not seriously questioning core gender identity may want incorporate their variance into their lives in a healthy way rather than let it perturb them once they know it is never going away. The alternative being to needlessly suffer and create trauma for themselves by wishing they were "normal" when we know the definition of what that is, is extremely relative.

Instead, it's best to think in terms of your own normal.

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