An invisible boundary

In the best of times family dynamics can be complex affairs. There are members we get along with better than others and after a while we are left reflecting on what value we bring to each other especially after a pandemic which offered both distance and opportunity of reflection.

As a natural introvert my preference is always for one on one interaction and putting me in a large and raucous group, only sees my energy and patience both quickly depleted. I have been known to do my best however to make it work.

Once a transgender person moves beyond a boundary line within a family structure where their identity introduces discomfort, a distancing is sometimes required to preserve both our mental health and self-respect. In the past we may have acquiesced to avoid awkwardness but once a boundary line is crossed we feel the need to establish a different connection. A "rapprochement" (en bon Francais) must be established where new bridges are built and unfortunately the track record of success here tends to be at best mixed. Some will get with the program and others won't.

Whether this redefining of connection is even desirable is up to both parties to determine because basing ourselves solely on shared history is, in my view, not at all sufficient. But we leave the door ajar just in case.