Clean the palette

If you saw that video I posted on Sam's detransition you would have learned that he was abused as a child which led to trauma and eventually loathing of the masculine self. Having now healed he has decided in his fifties that he never felt female but used it as a refuge to escape self-loathing.

Medical transition isn't for everyone and even most transgender people don't fully do so. There are always variants and if I've succeeded in passing on a message in my writing, I hope that it's about abandoning an all-or-nothing approach as the only way to honor core identity. Life is often messy and introduces many roadblocks which those of us who are older are all too familiar with. 

Conversely, ignoring gender dysphoria is never a good option.

The most important lesson I learned was that I could respect my identity while customizing a solution which respected my reality and life decisions I had made. I finally realized how I could allow my identity to flourish while accommodating my life situation and settled on social transition as a more than suitable compromise.

We used to get very hung up on what it means to be a man or a woman but with time the relaxing of gender expression norms has allowed many people to find their own unique formula. Not everyone suffers from agonizing levels of gender dysphoria and responding to our own situation with both introspection and patience can yield quite positive outcomes.

Without first dealing with any underlying issues of trauma, guilt, shame and most importantly fear of public ridicule, an optimal solution will not be found because our mind will be clouded with issues that don't permit clear thinking which is why before taking any concrete action we must first clean the palette.