Envelope

One way to know who we truly are is to push the envelope a bit. For example, I know that many people who enjoy sporadic cross gender expression would not much like living the way I need to once the novelty wears off. Conversely transsexual women would find my balance point to be insufficient for them.

Understanding this is a tale of trial and error which must necessarily involve brutal honesty with the self. Otherwise we are left unsatisfied and it's what motivated my post on whitewashing. It's an exercise which necessitates all guilt and shame be removed from the psyche before developing a response.

Many older transgender people such as myself entered marriages in complete denial only to discover later that the elephant in the room needed to be acknowledged. That we embarked on this existence with the best of intentions does not take away from the fact that dishonesty was involved beginning with the self.

If we are fortunate enough in our current lives to stretch our muscles a bit, that balance point can be found; the alternative being to be left in a permanent and dull state of anxiety which is never properly addressed. Should gender dysphoria be involved, it becomes all the more incumbent to act.