Two halves of a whole

One of the reasons I have never favored descriptions like gender fluid or bi-gender is that they suggest to me states of compromise instead of desired baselines. In other words, it is someone trying to navigate the difficulty of a desired situation against the reality of their lived experience and coming up with a name for it.

Personally I found living in two worlds difficult and all the more so when I used to view my cross gender feelings as an affliction. Today I have unified all of who I am into one being and wouldn't want to think of myself as two halves who lead separate lives.

I continue to maintain that I don't find this healthy for the psyche even as I acknowledge that there is no way around it for many due to previous life commitments. I just knew that continuing for me was leading to adverse conditions of anxiety I would not go back to. Certainly our identities cannot be defined simply because of our choice of clothing since there is far more to us than that and we want mature and cohesive identities which repatriate all aspects of ourselves.

This formula of two distinct halves can perhaps work if there is no gender dysphoria present or it is at least mild enough to not overly perturb the mental health. I would only say that if one is obsessively chomping at the bit until the next opportunity to express oneself, that there is material to examine since what we always strive for is peace and balance.