Counterintuitive

Here is something very counterintuitive: the more one worries about "passing" (a rather regretable term) the less one succeeds. This is because the concern will cause insecurity in us which will be detected.

Everyday I see women of all shapes and sizes some of whom look quite masculine, but they aren't reflecting on their gender and seem perfectly relaxed in their own skin as well they should be because they know who they are.

The more one focuses on "passing" the worse the results will be because people look primarily for self-confidence and not perfection.

It took me a while to learn that one and eventually realize that our job is mainly to work on our psychology.