Minefield

Curbing gender variant behaviour is a thorny subject which becomes all the more so within the context of a relationship. I always go back to the essential question: what is the motivation for the cross gender expression? 

Some people dress for pleasure and can modify their behaviour to suit the balance required to stay married. Others who have varying degrees of dysphoria will have more difficulty navigating this issue. If they see this as a question of identity it will be more challenging for them. 

Quite a while back I came to the conclusion that an issue of core identity cannot be readily negotiated away nor should it because one of the partners will also be unhappy. The spouse is getting a lesser version of that person. 

I have met recreational dressers as well as transsexual people and no matter what it is more often than not, a tricky issue.