Its either all or nothing isn't it?Some trans people know they needed to transition to save their mental and physical health while some who detransitioned talk about how it ultimately wasn't for them. Neither experience is invalid however because it is not a zero sum game and the fact that transition is right for some and not for others should not surprise anyone.
The framing from each corner would have you believe otherwise as each advocate talks from their own vantage point which is as unique as the stars in the heavens. The reality is that there isn't one answer; there is only your answer.
Transphobes point to detransitioners as proof that being trans is a fallacy which is of course disingenous because this would mean everyone who stayed transitioned was living a lie and only pretending to be happy. But then their objective is to throw the baby out with the bath water and not employ nuance when discussing the issue.
There are different ways to express your gender and for some it doesn't take more than a change of clothing to connect to another facet of themselves. That for others this does not work should not surprise because the permutations are so numerous; just like the stars.
Everyone has a vantage point and uses it to state their conviction regarding this issue but no one has that unique ability to live inside another person's skin. At least not yet.