Sunday, July 30, 2023

Migration

Becoming your true self can be a slow almost imperceptible process. It at first can appear you are wearing a costume (certainly during early childhood forays into your mother's closet it can) until over the years you slowly realize you are just putting on your clothes. Of course clothing is just a symbol for the internal process you are going through and never has what I wear mattered less. Although truth be told I never aim for frumpy.

The person we need to most convince is ourselves because we are our harshest critics. Internalized transphoia runs rampant in trans people of my generation and so the process of migration is certainly more difficult; such was our pervasive and unrelenting programming.

At first I was astounded that I was taken at face value as I thought everyone would see through what they would assess to be a disguise. That it never happened showed me to what extent I had advanced not only in confidence but, more importantly, in my ability to convey my true self to others.

Now when I remove clothing that is all I am doing because the person inside always remains.

Of that there is no doubt.

2 comments:

  1. I don't know when it happened over the last 3 years, but I went from "crossdressing" to "putting on my clothes" each day and getting on with things. Kinda of amazing.
    -Christina

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sounds like you are making progress but remember that there is no right or wrong answer only your own. The goal is achieving a balance which works for you and honors your sense of authenticity :)

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