Pull

My women friends who are in the know tell me I am happier and more genuine this way and I think they are right. What is interesting is the way doubt sometimes sneaks in from your upbringing. You feel great and yet that formative education tries sometimes to yank you back.

That I have not made any physical changes takes anyway any potential regret however I am nevertheless keenly aware of how pervasive programming can work on a person from infancy over decades. You understand how people have trouble leaving religious sects or cults.

I disregard that pull away from happiness as vestiges from the past but recognize I may never be completely rid of it.

Can I comprehend why some of us need to make physical changes? Absolutely.