Comprehension and a plan

Far more important than a self descriptor are first the issue of understanding the main motivation for our gender variance (whether identity, sexual or other) and then secondly how to proceed once we do. So while terminology may be important to us in helping to place where we are (perhaps relative to others), it completely pales when compared to these two key steps.

The presence of gender dysphoria (depending on its severity) will of course take away choice, but even there we can be judicious in how to tackle it by trying different methods until a solution is found which ultimately could be medical transition. Tiny steps towards that discovery will at least convince us it is the right thing.

Without comprehension and a plan we wil be hard pressed to find peace and balance. Also,  should our cross gender expression bring us distress, it's a sign that we have some work to do.