Trust

Trust is something we steadily lose as our childhood innocence is wiped away through life experience. We learn that not everyone is well-intentioned and we are eventually suffuciently singed such that we brace for impact perhaps as first reflex.

I was almost naive when young and brought up by parents who were both honorable and truthful. However as a transgender child you understand early that not every aspect of yourself can be shared as your secret life begins well before you hit puberty.

Now I have much cynicism to work on and a sense of self that sends clear messages I am not to be derailed. However this isn't good if want to return to some measure of vulnerability and tolerance. In having to work so hard to protect myself I might have overdone it just a bit.

Life has phases within it where we perfect a new and hopefully improved version of ourselves as we age; where the overshoots are reeled back in and we become measured and balanced yet again within each one.