Miscalculation

I have a relatively high IQ but my EQ (emotional quotient) for the longest time wasn't the best which is our ability to manage our own emotions, empathize with others and diffuse conflict. When something is off with us, empathy and tolerance for others can sometimes fall by the wayside.

I think about this as I reflect on an ex-colleague's current challenge with one of most temperamental people I have ever worked with during my career. He is number 1 on my list of difficult characters over all that time and he is creating trouble yet again for her. Over the years I came to conclude that he suffers from unresolved emotional issues.

I was never mean but could be temperamental and control was my way of keeping things tidy and neat. This included trying to regulate my emotions while being unable to communicate the biggest secret of my life which took more of a toll than I had imagined.

The other day when Suzan (the transgender woman from my neighborhood) approached me she said that we are tough as nails because we need to deal with so much internal pressure. She is right because as I look back it's a wonder I was able to live that way so long. One of the impacts was losing touch with my ability to relate to the difficulties of others who I saw as weak because they weren't able to right the ship as well as I could.

It was a big miscalculation which I am well underway to remedying.