Into the backgroind

The vast majority of people spend very little time thinking about their gender which is what I always wanted for myself. I wanted that brain disconnect gone which I first tried ignoring. That tactic having failed, I then looked for ways to blend my feelings harmoniously into my life.

Being transgender or transsexual isn't a sport or halloween dress up (something I've never done or had any interest in doing). It involves instead a low hum of disconnect which is always there asking that you address it.

Transgender youth don't have the experience of decades of denial and suppressing and so the last 15 years of my life have been spent trying to find harmony and balance with respect to my gender. This is the best place I've ever been with it but it will forever be an iterative process of clean up for someone who grew up traumatized through their rigid mid 20th century social and religious education.

You want gender to move more into the background like it does for everyone else which, with every passing year, I am having more success doing.

Harmony with much less in the way of peaks and valleys.