It's clear as day what happened to me. I learned to protect myself but overdid it and am working it back. It is why I am calmer than I've ever been. I have holstered my defense mechanisms.
When you become a machine you are more easily irritated by ineptitude and slowness because you don't forgive that in yourself. You also get irritated by people you deem to be just playing dress up and didn't suffer sufficiently which is precisely none of my business.
I'm much better now.
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