When something is off

Properly looking after the self is mandatory and if you fall into the problem solver category it is possible you aren't doing yourself any favors. It took me a long time to learn the lesson that we can only look after others properly once we tend to our own basic needs. 

We cannot save the drowning person if we do not first put on our life preserver. 

Many people from my generation learned duty first and thought that in adhering to it, we would find balance which wasn't always true. We entered into social contracts which weren't always equitable and suffered the consequences as a result.

If we are an honorable person we can find ways to help others without losing sight of the self. But when you have the formula wrong you can feel something is off until you address the underlying problem. 

We are all products of many influences and ideally they should be analyzed to determine why our attachment style isn't working for us and why we might feel we are getting the short end of the stick. 

This isn't about narcissism but instead self respect.