Three friends

I had lunch yesterday with three female colleagues (ranging between their late 30's and early 50's) who are difficult to assemble in one location thanks to the frantic pace of my former company. They are all doing well but then a good deal of the conversation hovered around work frustrations which is very understandable. They remind me of the stress I lived under for years which was punctuated by the gender dysphoria I did my best to manage. 

I've known them for years and they know all about my journey; maintaining a level of support I couldn't have imagined receiving years ago. I am just part of their group and they never falter with their use of pronouns. 

The difference I notice is mostly in my internal progress which they are of course not privy to. The discourse regarding where I was going to land with my day to day life going into retirement wasn't something they could viscerally understand even if they were extremely empathetic to what it might have been like had they been in my place. 

What is patently clear is that I have grown greatly in comfort and confidence over time which makes you more present to people. You aren't second guessing how you are being perceived because you are being yourself instead of putting on a mask. 

If I've learned anything in my life is that we constantly morph and change to hopefully become more authentic people. You don't care who is looking or why and, as a result, people can tell you know who you are. 

We texted each other afterwards and in response to me saying how lovely it was to see them altogether, Nadine wrote "it was lots of fun spending time with you ladies. Free group therapy!" 

Indeed; therapy for us all.