Plague

People who aren't transgender don't think about their gender at all. It simply is. 

They may regale in certain aspects but also sometimes curse its limitations. For example, a woman misses a promotion which is given to a less capable male colleague instead. 

For transgender people the goal should be to think about gender less not more. Yes, there is a long period of doubt which could last years or even decades where we are racked with confusion about what to do. What we want is a resolution to stop the brain from constantly thinking about it. 

Thinking too much about gender can be a plague. 

I think the first step lies in being less self-concious and remove the dread of daily public scrutiny. All people have insecurities but for transgender people it is exponentially higher and not without good reason. 

The rest of the battle is about quieting dysphoria through whatever treatment method is right for us. The aim should be to go about our day thinking less and less about the trappings of gender. 

Even people who blend perfectly into society (and may even have transitioned) can be plagued with impostor syndrome and spend their time second guessing what the person in front of them is thinking about them. 

All of this wears heavily on the psyche and our aim is to lighten that load. 

Youth has the advantage of having been born into a more tolerant and diverse world and thus less childhood trauma to deal with, but then they also face scrutiny through the increased public awareness of the topic. Transphobes are actively sharpening their knives whereas in the past it all lay much more underground. 

All this summarizes down to our psychology of course which isn't always easy. However without that internal work, no amount of physical changes will remedy the core challenge we face of strengthening courage, resolve and self-esteem.