Ties that bind

In the era of my parents and certainly before, marriages were ostensibly contracts. There was social stigma surrounding their dissolution which was made even more difficult by the binding of economics and children. Thinking about leaving could be entertained only as a concept.

Today we don't have the same ideas about what those relationships are supposed to mean other than they have been endowed by some with a mysticism that a partner should be perfectly suited for us. That this is impossible becomes more evident as we live the experience. 

On paper the best formula is two people who don't need each other but have decided that giving of themselves will  bring life added meaning. They are open to companionship but not one with the intent of filling their deficiencies and are able to laugh at life's absurdities with perspective. They understand that there will be ups and downs but concede that the effort is nonetheless worthwhile. 

I think I knew that going in but I just needed to live a while to be able to confirm it. Sometimes we find that formula and sometimes we don't.

That's life.